Drrrrained

Thank God I’m going out tonight. Hoping to find some positive energy to turn that down pression toward light and sun.

Winter is seeming to drain the life blood out of me.

This week feels like its put alot of us on the back foot

Days are hard and night seems to be the most inviting. Itching for unconsciousness to take me far away.

Ofsted under the brand spanking new framework put the whole school on heightened alert and tension.

Failing hot water drove me and the kids to biting one liners, filling up kettles and buckets with boiling water, incessant moaning and endless calls to the Council.

Proving I should retain child benefit that my ex is trying to take from me, find witnesses for an oncoming court case and fight for benefits that are my Right: enveloped me in mounds of hard, unsympathetic, blank, crackling, white paper – the canvass for hard evidence, I Must Find.

This is too hard.

It’s All on me.

4 hours of driving each day in a derelict car that needs daily top ups of water and oil filled me with exhausted numbness.

Couldn’t even write a blog. Couldn’t enunciate the sadness fog.

Can’t even find it in me to care if the Conservatives get in again, or look forward .. .

One thought on “Drrrrained

  1. Keep going and don’t give in…Winter is temporary and it will pass…look forward and always ahead to light wherever you see it…live today for what you can do in the here and now always look ahead…you are a strong woman within and a positive role model for your children…I too have had times excruciatingly difficult with my children, but I refuse to give in or break and I keep going waiting for a plumber to fix a broken tap in the incoming West Australian desert heat and no water…the solution, rest when you need to recharge your energies, and think a positive thought to overcome the negative…life makes us stronger. Not weakest…

    Like

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