I’m so fucking needy. I mean. I ask myself ‘why you so needy?’.
Everyone comments on it. Every boy and my mates. Sometimes I feel I’m just an annoying ache in this world.
Its become my USP, except that it makes me unsellable, undesirable.
I’ve made it such a big deal in my head that I can’t see anything good in me. The awareness of my neediness is spreading like some crazed super spreader. Blemishing my consciousness. Negating flashbacks. Haunted by my misdemeanors. Making me detest me. And guess what… I’ll just do it all over again.
Pendulum swinging to needless guilt from blind repetition.
Harmonious change is a distant hallucinatory hope, shimmering like a fake oasis in the far distance.